Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
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