I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Randomize
