Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
bring money and cleavage
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Found your dick twin last night
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
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