Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
Randomize
