it wasn't lemon gatorade
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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