i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
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