im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Randomize
