can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
