I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Randomize
