google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
