This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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