Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
The air taste purple.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
