Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
