you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
only you would photoshop your dick
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Randomize
