I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize