My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
