I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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