some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Pants 0. Shit 1.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize
