What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
