Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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