I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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