your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Randomize
