You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
