we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Randomize
