I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize