I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Randomize
