she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
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