why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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