why didn't you poke me back
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
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