I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
i am craving dick and cupcakes
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
