with your own penis?
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Randomize
