Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Randomize
