i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize