my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize