This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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