he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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