Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Randomize
