TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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