I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
