YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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