i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
