i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize
