he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
