She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
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