he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
