And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Randomize