That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
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