I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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