You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
