i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
Randomize
