I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
